This topic is important to me now as I am expecting my fourth child in August. Figuring out how to take care of the baby, the kids, and negotiating extended family and friends is always so difficult. Everyone wants to share the joy of a new baby but it is important to give the mom, dad and siblings grace during this time and honor what they need.
It’s definitely been a testing few days, even with a clear idea of our boundaries. The people pleaser in me will always be there, so even with these long established plans it’s still been really tricky to navigate.
I was much better with boundaries the third time around, especially with my mom which can be a tricky relationship to navigate. Congratulations on your new baby!
Wow, what an awful experience. I'm sorry you had to endure all of that. My wife and I live 2,000 miles away from our families so we never dealt with pushy family members when our children were born. At the time, I felt like I was stranded on an island of insanity but looking back I can see it was a blessing to be so distant from family.
Reminds me of all strategic plans of the war get forgotten when the first shot is fired overhead. Boundaries as a family during the first few weeks after baby arrives are easily made in advance but hard to keep in the throes of parenting. Brad you may now also have the complications of trying to heal some family relationships when they read about themselves in your articles....
That statement pretty much sums up everything to do with this past week for me! 😅 for sure though we’ve been tested despite the past experience.
You make a good point about having these conversations for real - I’ve always been a better writer than a speaker so if/when my family read these posts I’ll ultimately stand by what I’ve written. It is something I think about with every post though for sure.
I guess I don’t know any different than fathering girls - and I’m far from perfect - but the one thing I try to remember is that I’m the first male they’ve ever met, and so my role in modelling positive male behaviour is so important.
When I don’t handle my emotions well, I have to tell them that, explain why I reacted a certain way and how I should have handled it differently.
This topic is important to me now as I am expecting my fourth child in August. Figuring out how to take care of the baby, the kids, and negotiating extended family and friends is always so difficult. Everyone wants to share the joy of a new baby but it is important to give the mom, dad and siblings grace during this time and honor what they need.
It’s definitely been a testing few days, even with a clear idea of our boundaries. The people pleaser in me will always be there, so even with these long established plans it’s still been really tricky to navigate.
I was much better with boundaries the third time around, especially with my mom which can be a tricky relationship to navigate. Congratulations on your new baby!
Wow, what an awful experience. I'm sorry you had to endure all of that. My wife and I live 2,000 miles away from our families so we never dealt with pushy family members when our children were born. At the time, I felt like I was stranded on an island of insanity but looking back I can see it was a blessing to be so distant from family.
Reminds me of all strategic plans of the war get forgotten when the first shot is fired overhead. Boundaries as a family during the first few weeks after baby arrives are easily made in advance but hard to keep in the throes of parenting. Brad you may now also have the complications of trying to heal some family relationships when they read about themselves in your articles....
That statement pretty much sums up everything to do with this past week for me! 😅 for sure though we’ve been tested despite the past experience.
You make a good point about having these conversations for real - I’ve always been a better writer than a speaker so if/when my family read these posts I’ll ultimately stand by what I’ve written. It is something I think about with every post though for sure.
I am curious about father/daughter bonding. Do you do anything special to promote that?
I guess I don’t know any different than fathering girls - and I’m far from perfect - but the one thing I try to remember is that I’m the first male they’ve ever met, and so my role in modelling positive male behaviour is so important.
When I don’t handle my emotions well, I have to tell them that, explain why I reacted a certain way and how I should have handled it differently.