So, it’s been a while.
Last year, just as the school summer holidays were starting, I thought I needed a break from writing Some Other Dad. A few weeks, perhaps. I’d come back fresh when the chaos was over.
As it turned out, a meagre few weeks wasn’t enough. I couldn’t face coming back to what I was doing on here. So I shut it down.
In truth, I was pretty much set on never coming back to writing this again. That’s part of my personality, you see. When I get an idea for something in my idea, I obsess and obsess about it, burning white-hot with excitement, before crashing and burning when it gets too hard or I get in over my head.
A lot’s happened in a year, including my longing for writing returning. I missed the sense of purpose writing here about my experiences and half-cobbled together musings on fatherhood and parenting, that occasionally someone might find useful. I contemplated my return several times. I came very close in March, but I never made the leap.
Now though, the time’s right. But, with a few changes.
I once claimed that one of the virtues of this blog/newsletter/periodical/whatever you want to call it, was that we need to be kinder to ourselves as parents; recognise that life is fucking hard when you’re looking after little ones, and that you need to look after yourself.
Well, as it turns out, I was breaking that one virtue whilst writing Some Other Dad.
I became obsessive with making a success of this Substack page, to the point where I’d set myself a firm 5pm Friday deadline for each weekly post. Then I created social media profiles on all channels, planned content for each and scheduled it two weeks in advance. Then when that started falling apart, I thought it was a great idea to launch a paid offering here, with more weekly posts and more deadlines. All whilst expecting my second child, and being busy enough parenting the first.
It was too much to put on myself. There was only ever going to be one winner. And it made me dislike what I once loved doing.
I also started to notice that I was no longer writing for myself primarily, which I think is the one true sign in writing that you’re heading down the wrong path.
So now things will be different. I will post as regularly as I can, but don’t expect your inbox to ping at the same time every week with a new piece from me. It’ll be ready when it’s ready. I think that espouses a valuable lesson for the parent trying to do it all whilst already doing it all.
No social media profiles, no obsessing over subscriber numbers. Just writing what I feel, and hoping it helps someone feel seen or heard as they traverse the arduous and joyous road of early parenthood.
Welcome back to Some Other Dad.
Speaking of subscribers…
Ok, I’m already going back on my word. But just a quick note to those people who subscribed to Some Other Dad between the start of my long hiatus and now—hello! I’m half expecting many of you to freak out at this random email that’s popped into your inbox and unsubscribe. That’s cool. But you’re more than welcome to stick around!
Welcome back - you were missed! I was disappointed to see you had shut down because your writings are humorous and insightful.
Welcome back! It was a delight to read your latest post. I can appreciate everything you've shared and applaud you for restarting on your terms and pace You've given me some things to think about in my own life and I look forward to reading your writings again. Thank you.